Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Today's Special, Sour Grapes...

Alright, time for some good old fashioned venting:

Let's start with Jack Nicklaus, whining about how it's all about big drives now and that players like Tiger are ruining the game. Ex-queeze me!?? I don't recall the game being a lot more popular when it was nothing but old grey-haired white men gasping for breath after each putt just trying to make it to 18 so they could get drunk. Believe it or not, Jack, the game is in its golden age right now and didn't peak with Fuzzy Zoeller.

Next is Walter Cronkite, saying that kindly old man Bob Schieffer would have been a better anchor than Dan Rather for CBS for all these years. Thanks for the Happy Retirement wishes, you bitter old asshole. I'm pretty sure that the last time anybody gave a rat's ass what Cronkite had to say John Kennedy had a fresh new hole in his head. Hurry up and die already so that I don't have to keep saying to myself, "He's still alive?".

And finally, here's two fingers crossed that TK's admission that it's 'over' between him and Tonya Harding is the last we'll hear of that hatchet-faced, backwoods, double-wide dwelling skank. I hope that transvestite kicks your ass.


At 12:26 PM, Anonymous kinda shifty said...

This has no redeemable sports relevance, but you know who else isn't dead?

Mickey Spillane. Acocrding to the local daily paper (also not dead, surprisingly) he turned 87 yesterday.

As they say in Taunton, you do the math.


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