Tuesday, June 28, 2005

NBA Draft Preview

Time once again to prove to the world that I missed my calling as an NBA scout by sizing up the first 10 or so picks in this year's auditions for the next season of MTV Cribs. Past brilliant predictions of mine include Walt Williams becoming a superstar, Marcus Fizer being much better than Kenyon Martin and Jonathan Bender being the best straight from high school player ever.

1. Andrew Bogut - Bucks - Screw anyone who says this guy's the next Vlade Divac. This guy's the total package. He passes bullets with either hand, has a 7'4" wingspan and can shoot from outside. If Milwaukee passes him up, they're bigger fools than I thought.

2. Marvin Williams - Hawks - Most overrated #2 overall since Keith Van Horn. Might wind up being as good as Mike Sweetney.

3. Deron Williams - Jazz - Instantly makes Utah an exciting team to watch. Seeing Williams and AK-47 together will be a blast.

4. Chris Paul - Hornets - Head case. Remember, this is the guy who blasts people in the package when things don't go his way. If the Hornets couldn't win with Baron Davis, they can't win with this dope.

5. Raymond Felton - Bobcats - UNC's forgotten player. He'll be average and a good role player to slowly build with Okafor.

6. Martell Webster - Blazers - Not even the best high schooler coming out. The Blazers once again lay an egg and will lose this guy like Jermaine O'Neal just as he's about to get good.

7. Danny Granger - Raptors - No matter how good he is, will anyone notice while he's playing in Toronto? He'll be a great addition to Chris Bosh, but no one will care.

8. Channing Frye - Knicks - Everyone will go on and on about what a steal this pick is. He's not. Too skinny and will get pushed around in the low blocks.

9. Ike Diogu - Warriors - Best name in the draft since Pops Mensa-Bonsu dropped out. The addition of this beast makes the Warriors a top 6 team in the west. They will be next year's Phoenix Suns, run and gun and fun to watch.

10. Gerald Green - Lakers - Unfortunately for me and everyone else who hates the Lakers, this is the steal of the draft. Dude can jump through the roof of any gym in the country.

So there you have it. Reports later about how wrong I was about the order and reports in a few years about how Marvin Williams is the next Michael Jordan and how I'm the only person in the world that ever referred to him as overrated.


At 6:36 PM, Blogger Jeff said...

Looks like the Lakers picked the wrong High Schooler. Didja see the photo of Andrew Bynum? He looks like a slimmed-down Oliver Miller, which is still pretty overweight. 17 years old, 7 feet, a conservative 3 hundy pounds.


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